Over 100 million people in the USA, about 1 in 2, have a chronic illness. That means, if you are not the one suffering from chronic pain, chances are someone you care about is dealing with it silently.
Chronic illnesses are often invisible. In fact, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, approximately 96% of the people who have an illness do not use an assistive device, like a wheelchair or cane, and may not show any effects of the illness. Pain from a car accident, or the pain and fatigue from an illness such as lupus or fibromyalgia, is nearly always undetectable. But many of these people who suffer still get up and get to church, despite the chronic pain because they desire to stay a part of the church body.
I remember one specific day that I tried to make it through a church service. My rheumatoid arthritis was flaring badly, but since I had gotten there, I was determined to stay. “Please stand” they announced during worship and I took a deep breath and carefully pulled myself up, using the pew in front of me for leverage and balance. At the age of 24, fifteen years of living with this disease has left my feet deformed and painful, and my knees need joint replacements as soon as possible. I rolled my eyes as they sang a worship song and the lyrics declared, “I will stand in spite of pain.”
Even as I was surrounded by people in a church I loved, I still felt as though no one understood what I was going through-physically or emotionally.
Churches already feel pushed to the brink, trying to fulfill all the needs that are obvious. Even large churches lack the amount of volunteers they need to rock babies in the nurseries or visit the elderly who are unable to attend the weekly service. So, if the people who have a chronic illness aren’t even speaking up about their needs, then that must evidently mean that they are having all of them met, right? Pastors often ask, “If they don’t ask for what they need, how can we even know what it is? It sounds to me as though they must be coping perfectly fine if they aren’t calling us or asking for more prayer. They have their faith and that should be enough during the dark moments to carry them through.”
Let’s look at some stunning statistics:
- Despite what we may assume, 60% of those who live with daily illness or pain are between the ages of 18 and 64. - The divorce rate among the chronically ill is over 75 percent. - Depression is 15-20% higher for the chronically ill than for the average person. - Various studies have reported that physical illness or uncontrollable physical pain is major factors in up to 70% of suicides.*
Whether the need is obvious or not, we should be concerned because our churches are filled with many people who are living with chronic pain. And when chronic pain exists, broken spirits are also there. People are hurting silently and need help and encouragement. These are the broken-hearted that Jesus says he will give comfort.
So, one of the first hurdles to overcome is to find out what people with chronic illness need if they are being vocal about their situation. How do we help them?
1) First, take the time to conduct a survey about the needs people may have that they are not vocalizing, especially if you are a large church where people may be more reluctant to talk about their illnesses (or lack of healing thus far). In a recent Barna group study, it was found that larger churches were the least likely to mention congregational care ministries as a priority (Church Priorities for 2005 Vary Considerably).
Ask, “If a van was provided, would you be able to get to church more easily? Would you listen to church on the internet if you were too ill to attend? Do you feel you can call and ask for occasional personal assistance (especially if the illness is chronic and not acute)? Do you know who to call? Would you like the worship song lyrics in the bulletin and not just on an overhead? Are the seats comfortable or would you prefer a few rows be saved for you with cushions?” Brainstorm with a group of people who have a chronic illness and ask them for a wish list. Then sit down and prioritize.
(2) Provide a small group/Bible study setting for those with illness. For example, Rest Ministries, the largest Christian organization for the chronically ill, has a small group program called HopeKeepers which provides a wide variety of resources, Bible studies, and leader support for this purpose. You may find that although people enjoy the small groups they are in, they can start to feel that talking and praying about their illness week after week is a burden to others in the group. They often enjoy having a specific place where everyone “speaks the same language” and even giggles at the same jokes. It can be invigorating. And if only a few people come, that’s okay. It brings people comfort to know the church has this oasis when they need it.
(3) Invite guest speakers who have physical disabilities or live with chronic illness. There are amazing people that speak at churches, sharing their testimony and a wonderful message. By letting them be on stage and reveal what God has done in their lives, despite physical challenges, lets people in your church who are ill see that you do in fact recognize their needs. It reminds them that you care, and perhaps most importantly of all, that you believe that people with physical challenges are still worthy to be used by God (a message few hear from their church). Speakers such as Dave Dravecky, Lisa Copen, Joni Eareckson Tada, Nick Vujicic, and many others, minister to the masses, not just those with disabilities.
(4) Consider adding a parish nurse to your staff, especially if your church body has a lot of seniors. Marquette University College of Nursing, which has an excellent parish nursing program, reports there are about 6000 parish nurses in United States. Many retired nurses are finding this area of ministry appealing and most parish nurse certification can be given by many hospitals. The parish nurse position description depends on your church’s needs and goals. For example, they may go to homes to monitor diabetes or high blood pressure of church members, organize walking groups, health fairs and screenings, and even help out with the chronic illness small group. The role of the parish nurse may be a better choice than a disabilities coordinator, depending on your church’s demographics. This person would help cover the disability ministry needs and work closely with the congregational care pastor.
(5) Be a clearinghouse of helpful resources for the ill that are available for borrowing. Many people with chronic illness are on a fixed-income and yet they are trying to find encouragement. Stock your church library with books on living with chronic illness such as “Why Can’t I Make People Understand?” or “Beyond Casseroles: 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend,” by Lisa Copen or the exceptional book on suffering, “When God Weeps” by Joni Eareckson Tada. Buy a few subscriptions to magazines such as “HopeKeepers”, “Guideposts” and even “Arthritis Today.” Remember to have books on tape, audio presentations and large-print materials whenever they are available. Post flyers or have brochures available about chronic illness or disability ministries, such as Joni’s “Wheels for the World” program or Rest Ministries’ annual outreach, “National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week.” A volunteer could collect materials of local and national ministry resources for a binder; items could include lists of local resources and national ministries and put them in binder; lists of organizations, magazines and newsletters on topics for Christian seniors, those with disabilities, caregivers, and assisted living to name a few.
(6) Finally, and perhaps most importantly, keep in mind that people with illness want to help serve. Not just be served. Proverbs 11:25 says, “He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.” For example, if a woman with a chronic illness explains that she must resign from teaching Sunday school, make sure she knows that she is welcome to serve in other ways when she is ready. Though she no longer is physically able to teach four-year-olds, she may discover that she loves writing notes to people who have just been diagnosed with a chronic illness. A man may discover that he prefers mentoring another man with a chronic illness one-on-one, instead of leading a weekly Bible study. Let people know that you value wounded healers and that your church believes that God comforts us “so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God” (2 Corinthians 1:4).
About twice a month someone tells me that they went to their pastor with a request to start a chronic illness HopeKeepers ministry and they were told, “Come back when you are healed and then we will talk. You can’t very well minister to others with illness when you aren’t even healed yourself.” The broken hearts that arise from these comments is unbearable. It’s devastating to feel like God is using your illness for His glory and then be told you are no longer useful to the church-or even to God-until you are healed.
In the parable Jesus shares in Luke 14:21, a man asks his friends to come to a great banquet he has prepared. But his friends turn him down. Upset with their lack of graciousness he orders, “Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame.” This is still a directive to us today. Too few of our churches have recognized the needs of the chronically ill in their own church, much less their community. We must focus on providing a place where we offer unconditional hospitality. We need to “go out” into our own pews and ask the chronically ill to help us provide a place of refuge. And then these people will become the comforters, who, with the support of their church, will be able to go out into the community and offer to walk alongside the hurting with understanding.